how many medical personnel does it take...

Today we had our big orientation appointment at our clinic. We started by meeting with a nurse who went through what medications I'll be on, our calendar, and how to give myself the injections. Then we met with someone in the business office. Then we met with someone from the lab about donating our "unused genetic material." Then we met with some young doctor to review some other forms. Then another older doctor came in to go over the same forms. Then another younger doctor also shook our hand but I don't know why she was there. We had not met any of these people once during any previous visits so if nothing else I feel like there is a team of 20 people working on our "case."

One interesting thing we realized today was that even though we'd never met any of these people before, they all seemed to be on top of our details - they knew what our preferences were, when we'd be starting, etc. I asked how many PGD cases they typically do and apparently they only do about 10 per year. Maybe that is why we are more memorable?

My other theory is that we had an (apparently) unusual request regarding what sex embryo should be transferred in the event that we get two spectacular blasts. Basically, if we have two equally strong blasts - one male and one female, both without the MD gene - then we want the female transferred just in case the genetic test is wrong. That way in the 1% chance the test is wrong, we end up with a carrier and not a boy with MD. Didn't seem crazy to me but we learned today that it required approval from the ethical board at the clinic/hospital. Maybe that is why they remember us?

Although today was stressful, I am excited to get this show on the road. I'm currently on BCP and I'm guessing it will seem like no time at all before I'm injecting myself. Which, btw, I'm a little apprehensive about but I'm sure I'll get over. They're all sub-q except for the one-time hcg shot so hopefully it won't be too bad. And they even let my needle-phobic hubby off the hook! They told us if he's really stressed about giving me the shot, there is no problem with having my brother-in-law the doctor do it (or a nurse, or whatever).

I am now watching some hockey and trying to relax. I got tickets for Christmas for a game in mid-February - which happens to fall during what will likely be the dreaded two-week-wait following our (hopefully!) successful transfer. Fingers-crossed that we'll make it that far.

lottery

The New York Times started running a series of stories called "21st Century Babies" this week. The first story dealt primarily with the problems that result from multiple births, even with twins, for both the mother and the babies. If the information cited in the article is even close to the truth, I already feel misled by every doctor I've talked to thus far.

I think the doctors, clinics, and often the patients seeking IVF lose sight of the big picture. There are numerous risks involved with twin pregnancies, including birth defects, low birth weights, premature labor, not to mention additional procedures, surgeries, and bed rest for the mother. The costs of these things are enormous - emotional, moral, physical, economical. If you've been trying to get pregnant, and keep failing, I can understand how maybe as you get older you will start to get more desperate to have a baby. Period. The cognitive dissonance kicks in and the only way you can make sense of what you've already gone through is to hold "Getting Pregnant" above all else. Including "Having a Healthy Baby." Unfortunately they are not necessarily one and the same.

For me, the whole purpose of doing IVF is to avoid passing on a disease to my future children. In other words, the goal is Healthy Baby. For all I know, the Getting Pregnant goal might not even be that hard for me to reach. Why on earth would I put myself through the entire IVF process just to trade in the risk of one disease (muscular dystrophy) for multiple increased risks of other medical problems (including cerebral palsy, lifelong learning disabilities, deafness, blindness, etc.)?

The good news is that I meet all the criteria for an ideal candidate for single embryo transfer (SET). I am under 35 (I turn 27 next week), I've not had failed IVF cycles, etc. I'm just pissed off that I had to learn this from www.nytimes.com instead of my doctor. No harm, no foul, at this point but still frustrating. I'm taking this as just another reminder that we are our best advocates. We can't rely on others to ask the questions, educate us about options, and keep our long-term best interests in mind.