The doctor from the lab called me back this morning, apparently he never got the message that he was supposed to call me yesterday. Anyhow, I don't even care anymore because 14 of the embryos are still growing strong and were successfully biopsied! I talked to the guy who actually did the biopsies yesterday and he said they are all impressed with how well the embryos are growing. They were all at least eight cells and he said they are actually growing better than normal. Yay! He even mentioned how they are pretty sure there will be extras to freeze, which is awesome because we are only transferring one this first time.
Upon learning this information via text message this morning, my husband replied (in a shout-out to the movie Juno) that "our babies must want to 'get born'!" He is such a dork. :) We were talking yesterday about how crazy it is to think that our genes are combined right now and that our future baby is hopefully technically in existence right now. It's even crazier to think that the little embies are 90 minutes away. I am definitely feeling the drive to get at least one of them back where it belongs - in my welcoming uterus! Haha.
SO nice to have some good news today. The biopsied cells should be at the genetics lab by now but it takes OVER 17 HOURS to run the tests! Which means there is a team of doctors working around the clock and we won't actually know how many of the embies are MD-free until we get to the hospital tomorrow morning. But odds are we will get about 7! I was so excited this morning that I actually changed into jeans instead of sweatpants (although they are now unbuttoned for comfort's sake). :)
Monday, February 8, 2010
Sunday, February 7, 2010
relief
Thank god. Today was SO much better. I'm still tired and uncomfortable but the really annoying pain seems to have subsided. Very very happy that I don't seem to be having any more OHSS symptoms to be concerned about. This morning I was actually able to sleep in a bit - first time in ten days because the rest of the time I wake up so uncomfortable that I've felt the need to just get up, shower and move to the couch. HUGE relief today on the "me" front.
As for the embies, still no word on how they are doing. I was assured on Friday that someone from the lab would call me this afternoon to let me know how many were big enough to be biopsied and sent to the genetics lab for PGD testing. Nurse: "Oh it shouldn't be a problem. The lab told me someone will call you Sunday afternoon and let you know how many samples were couriered to Detroit. Is this the number they should call?" I sat around all afternoon waiting for the phone to ring, and the only person who called was my brother to talk about our Super Bowl food. I'm pretty annoyed but at this point, realize there is absolutely nothing I can do about it until tomorrow morning. *sigh*
The good news is that I got a message on the "lab call" system that we are set for the transfer on Tuesday morning. I am taking this as a positive sign, since there must be embryos growing properly in order for them to go ahead and schedule that. Trying to focus on that positive!
Finally, as I mentioned before, our clinic is 90 minutes away on a good weather day. Too bad we live in the Midwest and it is February because we're now in a winter storm watch until Tuesday morning. So yeah, now I have to miss my evening class again tomorrow so we can leave early and try to avoid the worst of it. The last thing I need right now is to end up in the ditch, but DH has promised me he will get me there tomorrow night so we'll be ready to go in the morning. It's times like these that I wonder, why do I live here?
As for the embies, still no word on how they are doing. I was assured on Friday that someone from the lab would call me this afternoon to let me know how many were big enough to be biopsied and sent to the genetics lab for PGD testing. Nurse: "Oh it shouldn't be a problem. The lab told me someone will call you Sunday afternoon and let you know how many samples were couriered to Detroit. Is this the number they should call?" I sat around all afternoon waiting for the phone to ring, and the only person who called was my brother to talk about our Super Bowl food. I'm pretty annoyed but at this point, realize there is absolutely nothing I can do about it until tomorrow morning. *sigh*
The good news is that I got a message on the "lab call" system that we are set for the transfer on Tuesday morning. I am taking this as a positive sign, since there must be embryos growing properly in order for them to go ahead and schedule that. Trying to focus on that positive!
Finally, as I mentioned before, our clinic is 90 minutes away on a good weather day. Too bad we live in the Midwest and it is February because we're now in a winter storm watch until Tuesday morning. So yeah, now I have to miss my evening class again tomorrow so we can leave early and try to avoid the worst of it. The last thing I need right now is to end up in the ditch, but DH has promised me he will get me there tomorrow night so we'll be ready to go in the morning. It's times like these that I wonder, why do I live here?
Saturday, February 6, 2010
i'm a wreck
This has been the worst day thus far, at least when it comes to pain. In the past 36 hours, I hit two new lows: I went out in public (to Chipotle, no less!) in sweatpants (with writing on the ass!) AND I had to ask my mother-in-law to help me clean the house. Yeah, pretty pathetic. Although I am definitely thankful for mom-in-law's help, it truly pained me to admit I couldn't take care of my own grimy house. (Note to self: If you ever do IVF again, be sure to clean the house before starting injections because it will only get worse) You may be wondering why DH did not do the cleaning? The poor man has been working, doing my bidding, cooking my dinner, being woken up by my tossing and turning every night, and fighting a nasty cold for the past five days. Poor guy! So I okay'ed the plan to call in the reinforcements.
So yeah, the pain. Why didn't anyone tell me the pain could be worse *after* the retrieval?! I stupidly assumed that taking things out would make me feel less bloated. Ha! None of the people involved in my medical care warned me of this, and then they get annoyed when I call the on-call RE on a Saturday. *sigh* I'm one of those people that can take quite a lot of pain and BS if I have the opportunity to brace myself, but I had no idea this was coming. It's come to this: I'm thankful that I can still button my pants (I put real pants on today - shocker!) and at least the RE doesn't seem to think it is severe enough OHSS to warrant putting off the transfer (which I am kind of scared of). I have no other symptoms besides the bloating, haven't gained weight, ovaries themselves don't hurt, etc. but oh my god do I ever want my body back. And while I'm at it, I'd like my mind back too! (I've cried at least 20 times today)
(One of my dogs is attempting to make a nest on the floor right now with a blanket. He keeps grabbing the edge of the blanket with his mouth to arrange it, while pushing the rest of it around with his paws. This is now the highlight of my day.)
I think from now on I just have to start totally believing that this will happen for us eventually. Because it is just too much to take without believing it will be worth it in the end.
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I forgot to add: Thank you so much for the encouraging comments! Knowing I am not alone with this means a lot.
So yeah, the pain. Why didn't anyone tell me the pain could be worse *after* the retrieval?! I stupidly assumed that taking things out would make me feel less bloated. Ha! None of the people involved in my medical care warned me of this, and then they get annoyed when I call the on-call RE on a Saturday. *sigh* I'm one of those people that can take quite a lot of pain and BS if I have the opportunity to brace myself, but I had no idea this was coming. It's come to this: I'm thankful that I can still button my pants (I put real pants on today - shocker!) and at least the RE doesn't seem to think it is severe enough OHSS to warrant putting off the transfer (which I am kind of scared of). I have no other symptoms besides the bloating, haven't gained weight, ovaries themselves don't hurt, etc. but oh my god do I ever want my body back. And while I'm at it, I'd like my mind back too! (I've cried at least 20 times today)
(One of my dogs is attempting to make a nest on the floor right now with a blanket. He keeps grabbing the edge of the blanket with his mouth to arrange it, while pushing the rest of it around with his paws. This is now the highlight of my day.)
I think from now on I just have to start totally believing that this will happen for us eventually. Because it is just too much to take without believing it will be worth it in the end.
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I forgot to add: Thank you so much for the encouraging comments! Knowing I am not alone with this means a lot.
Friday, February 5, 2010
waiting and worrying
So only 16 of the eggs fertilized. I am pretty bummed out about this, especially since it actually means we probably have 8. The smaller that number gets, the more scared I get that we won't end up with any MD-free eggs that make it to Day 5. And even though I know that likely 50% will have the bad gene, what if we have bad luck and it is more than that? Or what if the ones that survive are all the ones with MD, and the ones that don't make it were the ones that were unaffected? I know I have absolutely no control over this, and worrying won't actually accomplish anything, but I can't stop myself.
I did call and talk to one of the nurses and she assured me that 16 was normal and nobody is concerned about it on their end so that helps a little bit. Also, my ovaries felt like shit this morning and I guess that's going to stick around for awhile. It's hard to set aside my worrying when my body is constantly reminding me of what we're going through. Also, I am now officially falling behind in school after an entire week of accomplishing pretty much nothing. It's going to be a LONG weekend.
I did call and talk to one of the nurses and she assured me that 16 was normal and nobody is concerned about it on their end so that helps a little bit. Also, my ovaries felt like shit this morning and I guess that's going to stick around for awhile. It's hard to set aside my worrying when my body is constantly reminding me of what we're going through. Also, I am now officially falling behind in school after an entire week of accomplishing pretty much nothing. It's going to be a LONG weekend.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
i survived. :)
And so did 32 of my eggs! I am so excited that we got so many - I know they won't all fertilize, and I know chances are that half of them will have the "bad" gene, but 32 seems great to me. (Up until five days ago, I thought we would have been really happy with 20) It feels so great to get past this part of the process. It is such a huge relief that those little eggies I've been incubating are finally safely in the lab and no longer fully my responsibility. :)
I can also already tell that I feel less bloated, which is fantastic. I took a long nap this afternoon lying on my side, something I've been wanting to do for over a week but couldn't. Thank god for the small things, right?
There was quite the crowd at the retrieval. Is it normal for 4+ doctors to hang around?? I think two of them were residents, but it still seemed like a lot. I guess it makes sense though - we've definitely gotten the impression that we are "an interesting case" since they don't do tons of PGD cases and we are so "young." Which, by the way, I find hilarious that everyone is always exclaiming at how young I am. Infertility World is the only place that ever happens.
I'm still feeling (emotionally) really good after this morning but all that waiting is still hovering over me. Yay.
I can also already tell that I feel less bloated, which is fantastic. I took a long nap this afternoon lying on my side, something I've been wanting to do for over a week but couldn't. Thank god for the small things, right?
There was quite the crowd at the retrieval. Is it normal for 4+ doctors to hang around?? I think two of them were residents, but it still seemed like a lot. I guess it makes sense though - we've definitely gotten the impression that we are "an interesting case" since they don't do tons of PGD cases and we are so "young." Which, by the way, I find hilarious that everyone is always exclaiming at how young I am. Infertility World is the only place that ever happens.
I'm still feeling (emotionally) really good after this morning but all that waiting is still hovering over me. Yay.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
the final (egg) countdown
We're in the hotel, two blocks away from the hospital, and 8.5 hours from check-in time. I keep reminding myself that a lot more has to go right for us, but I am really excited to get past this step. I'm not even that freaked out about the procedure itself since I know I'll be out of it while it's going on.
The hcg shot last night went fine, and was actually really amusing. My trusty brother-in-law the doctor and his wife came over for dinner (we bought chinese) and then it was shot time! It was kind of funny to see him in "doctor mode." I was glad right away that I asked him to do it - it was clear that he was completely comfortable with mixing the medication, prepping the syringe, etc. Unfortunately, however, I will now have to endure "hey remember that time J. poked Kelly in the ass?" jokes from my family. Guess it could be worse. :)
Fingers crossed for lots of healthy eggs tomorrow!!
The hcg shot last night went fine, and was actually really amusing. My trusty brother-in-law the doctor and his wife came over for dinner (we bought chinese) and then it was shot time! It was kind of funny to see him in "doctor mode." I was glad right away that I asked him to do it - it was clear that he was completely comfortable with mixing the medication, prepping the syringe, etc. Unfortunately, however, I will now have to endure "hey remember that time J. poked Kelly in the ass?" jokes from my family. Guess it could be worse. :)
Fingers crossed for lots of healthy eggs tomorrow!!
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
yay!
We got the go-ahead for the hcg - woo-hoo! I know there is a lot more that has to continue to go right for us, but I am so excited to get to this huge step.
Obviously I've never done this before and I'm not a doctor, but my follies seemed frickin' huge. There were at least 32 measurable today. I think even G. was shocked at how much those little things can grow in just two days. I'm a little freaked out about my first IM shot tonight but know it will be fine. The plan is for my brother-in-law the doctor to administer it, since poor G. hates needles and blood. G. claims he can do it if he absolutely has to, but I think we're both relieved that my brother-in-law offered to do it. We are also buying my siblings-in-law dinner tonight as a thank-you since they are also taking care of our dogs tomorrow night. Even though my RE is "only" 90 minutes away, I have to be there at 6:30am on Thursday so we're staying in a hotel just in case the roads are bad. So many things to get arranged in the next couple hours!
Odd coincidence of the day: I finally got changed back into my sweatpants, plopped myself on the couch, and turned on the TV... just as a Law & Order SVU episode started involving stolen embryos from an infertility clinic. So weird! As I type, Olivia and Elliot are watching a doctor remove a cell for PGD! What the hell! Anyhow, now I have to watch this and see how many facts about PGD are misconstrued....
(PS - I am still physically pretty uncomfortable but am so emotionally uplifted by getting the go-ahead and no more shots for awhile, that I am trying to ignore the discomfort)
Obviously I've never done this before and I'm not a doctor, but my follies seemed frickin' huge. There were at least 32 measurable today. I think even G. was shocked at how much those little things can grow in just two days. I'm a little freaked out about my first IM shot tonight but know it will be fine. The plan is for my brother-in-law the doctor to administer it, since poor G. hates needles and blood. G. claims he can do it if he absolutely has to, but I think we're both relieved that my brother-in-law offered to do it. We are also buying my siblings-in-law dinner tonight as a thank-you since they are also taking care of our dogs tomorrow night. Even though my RE is "only" 90 minutes away, I have to be there at 6:30am on Thursday so we're staying in a hotel just in case the roads are bad. So many things to get arranged in the next couple hours!
Odd coincidence of the day: I finally got changed back into my sweatpants, plopped myself on the couch, and turned on the TV... just as a Law & Order SVU episode started involving stolen embryos from an infertility clinic. So weird! As I type, Olivia and Elliot are watching a doctor remove a cell for PGD! What the hell! Anyhow, now I have to watch this and see how many facts about PGD are misconstrued....
(PS - I am still physically pretty uncomfortable but am so emotionally uplifted by getting the go-ahead and no more shots for awhile, that I am trying to ignore the discomfort)
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